


Gated Hint

by echoflowertea



Series: Living [9]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: F/M, Female Reader, Reader Is Not Frisk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-10
Updated: 2016-05-12
Packaged: 2018-06-06 23:03:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 14,587
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6773881
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/echoflowertea/pseuds/echoflowertea
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You had a good feeling about today.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Gated Hint

**Author's Note:**

> i think this is going to be a two-parter, so stay tuned for another chapter to this!
> 
> also, i figured i should mention: the reason why i post these fics separately is because they can stand alone. i mean i know not everyone wants to read each installment, or long fics turn people off, so i do this because it's easier for me. i just write more efficiently when i treat them as one-shots instead of chapters.

He wasn’t exactly late, but you were still nervous.

Papyrus said he would pick you up after work. You’d been planning this for weeks now. Normally you wouldn’t sweat it out if he wanted to spend some time alone, but since recognizing some…confusing feelings, you didn’t want to make an ass out of yourself. Or end up looking like a creep by trying to hint at something more.

Needless to say, you anticipated this trip just as much as you feared it.

You glanced down the street once more. No sign of him yet. Ugh, this was stupid. You shouldn’t go into it thinking that something would happen. You were too much of a coward, and Papyrus was way too sweet to make a move. Actually, you weren’t exactly sure he shared the same sentiment you did in the first place. He was one of the most brutally honest and forward people you knew. If he liked you, you felt like he would’ve said something by now.

Wait. This was about him. Not you. You shouldn’t bog down your trip with so much negativity.

You heard the gentle hum of an engine in the distance and perked up. There he was! In all of his over-the-top glory. No one could pull off a candy apple red convertible and shades like he could. You grinned despite yourself, watching him pull up to the curb with as much precision as he practiced with his magic. He looked so carefree and excited.

“BESTIE! I AM SORRY I CUT IT CLOSE! TRAFFIC WAS MUCH BUSIER THAN I IMAGINED.” He unclicked his seatbelt and stepped toward you, shoulders back and stance impeccable. He was dressed casual today, weather appropriate, in a pair of shorts and a muscle tank with ‘Da Bomb’ written in neon letters. “ARE YOU READY TO GO?”

You nodded and headed toward him. You ignored your twisting stomach. “I’m super excited! How long is it going to take?”

“IT SHOULD ONLY BE AN HOUR. OF COURSE, THAT ALL DEPENDS…” He held the door open for you, beaming. “ON THE ABILITIES OF MY CO-PILOT!”

You pumped a fist, not even thinking about how much of a dork you looked like in front of your work. “Are you serious? This is the greatest pre-trip gift you could’ve ever given me!”

“I KNOW. IT WAS A DIFFICULT DECISION, AS IT IS A VERY SERIOUS POSITION. BUT I KNEW YOU WOULD BE THE RIGHT PERSON FOR THE JOB.”

“Your confidence in me is ridiculously inspiring.”

You settled in the passenger seat and he closed the door behind you. He was on air today and his attitude was infectious. When you both buckled up, Papyrus put the car into gear and peeled out of the parking lot. You let out a giddy laugh as you said goodbye to the hellish place you’d been stuck at for the past eight hours, finally free and with just the right company to make you forget all about it.

Papyrus was a great driver. He was calm, collected, perceptive and had an impeccable sense of timing. Operating a car was much like solving a puzzle, he told you. While Sans dealt with the technicalities of the car itself, Papyrus was a master of the roads. Weaving in-between people, driving through ice, rain, snow, sleet, hail. He navigated through an extensive mental map, coming up with a multitude of solutions to reach his destination happy and safe.

He didn’t really need you as his co-pilot. It was more of a formality. You still took it in stride, turning up the volume on your phone so the automated voice could guide you onto the highway.

Man, it was a perfect day for a drive. Warm and sunny, the rays stroking your skin, the breeze from the top down ruffling your hair and bringing a smile to your face. You glanced at Papyrus while he adjusted his rearview mirror, gripping the wheel with his other hand to keep the car steady. Cars whizzed past you and set off into the distance, disappearing beyond the horizon and the bright, cloudless blue skies.

“WE SHOULD ARRIVE JUST ON TIME! I KNEW I COULD TRUST YOU!”

Your cheeks felt warm at his words. “Haha, good! I know how important this is to you.”

You would have a heart attack if you had to navigate in an unknown city. Your destination was a massive hub of both people and monsters. It was probably one of the most well-adjusted places since your return to the surface. But one look at that skyline in the distance and your palms started to sweat.

Lots of people. Lots of crowds. Lots of…eyes. On you. Yikes. You swallowed and stole a glance at Papyrus, whose expression was the exact opposite of yours. He was determined to get there and he would no doubt drink in all the sights.

Keep positive. He was going to have a good time if it was the last thing you did.

Traffic right outside the limits was a nightmare, but Papyrus knew exactly which lane to choose and what exit to take to avoid any more of it. When you pulled into the heart of the city, he excitedly rattled off on all of the cool things he caught sight of on the road.

You stopped at the convention center. There was already a long line outside the doors. Damn, people here were so fucking cool. You would never be able to pull off that outfit! You found yourself staring and almost tripped when heading onto the sidewalk, Papyrus reaching back to steady you.

“WOWIE. LOOK AT ALL OF MY COMPETITION!” He was thrilled. “I CANNOT WAIT TO MEET ALL OF THEM INSIDE.”

“You’ve got this, Paps. You’re gonna destroy them!”

“NOW YOU SOUND LIKE UNDYNE. DESTROY IS A LITTLE EXCESSIVE. I WILL JUST BEAT THEM INTO THE GROUND WITH MY SUPERIOR SKILLS!”

You both broke into laughter, heading in.

Holy shit.

The place was _packed_. Bodies thriving everywhere. You could barely hear yourself think with the hundreds of conversations overlapping each other. Laughter in that corner, whispering to your right, screaming to the left. It surrounded you and swallowed you up, each noise sending irrational thoughts to your brain and causing your anxiety levels to spike. There was no room to navigate, bodies shoulder to shoulder, people casually pushing through others and leaving absolutely zero space in line, hot breath brushing against the back of your neck. You could feel the beginnings of collapsing into yourself like a dying star, the prickling starting at your forehead and spreading across your entire face.

“THIS IS ALREADY VERY INTERESTING.” Papyrus’ voice cut through your panic, though it was still muffled against the backdrop of the world around you. “I HAVE NEVER SEEN SO MANY HUMANS AND MONSTERS IN ONE PLACE!”

Someone shoulder checked you and you flinched harder than you should have, recoiling. Papyrus noticed it right away and his expression turned to that of concern.

“W-where are we going?” You stammered as he gently nudged you to the mostly deserted corner behind a pillar. You settled long enough for you to catch your breath, heartbeat dying in the center of your chest.

“I APPRECIATE YOUR BRAVERY, BESTIE. BUT IF THIS IS TOO MUCH, WE DO NOT HAVE TO DO THIS.”

That broke your fucking heart. “N-NO! I’m fine! I just…it’s a little overwhelming. I can get through this, Paps. I can do this!”

“I DO NOT WANT YOU TO PUSH YOURSELF.” His voice quivered just the slightest. “WE CAN ALWAYS TRY AGAIN NEXT YEAR? IT IS NOT THAT BIG OF A DEAL! IT GIVES ME MUCH MORE TIME TO REFINE MY ALREADY NEAR-PERFECT SKILLS!”

He wasn’t going to do this to you. “Stop! Look, I won’t lie to you. This is…kind of uncomfortable. But I’m going to get through it for you! This is important. It’s your big day and I’ll be damned if I let it slip because you’re trying to protect me.”

“IT-IT IS NOT NECESSARY FOR YOU TO PUSH YOURSELF!!! I DO NOT WANT YOU TO SUFFER THROUGH THIS!”

“If I don’t, I’ll never become desensitized to it.” You rubbed your arm and glanced at the ground. “I just. I want to support you. We’re besties, right?”

“YES. THE BESTEST OF BESTIES. DOUBLE BESTIES.”

“Then don’t worry about me and concentrate on your victory.” You shot him a confident smile that wavered just the slightest. “I’m here for you.”

He marched you right through the sea of bodies and you held your breath. To make sure you didn’t get lost amongst the more…confident participants, he took a firm grip of your hand. You welcomed that so much more than complete strangers even brushing up against you, and relished his touch like it was a lifeline.

You stood in front of the main sign-in table. A monster manned the station, using all of their extra limbs to busy themselves with stamping and filing paperwork.

Papyrus greeted them with his usual bravado. “HELLO, FRIEND. MY NAME IS THE GREAT PAPYRUS, MASTER PUZZLE SOLVER, AND I AM HERE TO ENTER THE COMPETITION!”

The monster typed away at their laptop and peered at the screen. “Looks like you…actually registered with us last year? A minute after the last competition ended?”

“YES!!! IT WAS SO INSPIRING I HAD TO MAKE SURE I RESERVED A SPOT! DO YOU NEED ANYTHING FURTHER FROM ME?”

“Now that you’re checked in? Nope? Just fill your name out?” He handed Papyrus a nametag hung on a string. “This will help us make sure you’re in the right spot? Maybe meet some new people?”

“OOH, GOODIE! THIS IS A GREAT IDEA!!! MAY I HAVE AN EXTRA?”

“Uh, sure? I’ve got plenty? Some of the kids lose ‘em anyway?”

He scribbled his name down with near flawless penmanship. Was there anything he was bad at?

“HERE YOU ARE.”

You laughed when he draped the second one over you, the nametag settling on the center of your chest. “I don’t think I need one.”

“NONSENSE. AS OFFICIAL COMPANION TO A PARTICIPANT, IT IS ONLY FITTING!” You broke away from the table, the monster resuming his duties behind you with shuffling and scraping. “BESIDES, THIS WAY, IF YOU ARE OVERWHELMED, OTHERS MAY SEE YOUR NAME AND HELP YOU INSTEAD OF REGARDING YOU AS JUST ANOTHER IGNORABLE FACE!”

That was too sweet. You lifted the nametag and gazed at it, marveling at the gorgeous cursive done with sweeping ink. “Hey, is that a little heart at the end?”

“WHAT? NO. I-IT IS A FORMAL SIGNATURE! EVERYONE KNOWS THAT!”

“Your signature is a heart?”

“YES. I MEAN, NO!!!”

“That’s really cute, Paps. I love it.”

“YOU DO? TH-THEN IT WAS A HEART ALL ALONG! YOU ARE FAR TOO CLEVER FOR ME TO JAPE AFTER ALL!”

You had about half an hour to kill before the competition started. You and Papyrus sat on a bench near the back of the floor and he had you quiz him on some flashcards he made to prepare. He was more than ready and you were sure he would kill it out there. But, as always, underneath that air of confidence was just a small spark of uneasiness.

“Okay, when you win, we have to celebrate. We should go to that organic pasta store.”

“WHAT ORGANIC PASTA STORE?”

“Whaaaat? I didn’t tell you?” You did this on purpose. “There’s this place here in the city that’s full of every noodle you could ever dream of. It’s where a lot of restaurants buy their products in bulk. And they have a pasta bar where we can try what we want to buy!”

You couldn’t even place his expression. After knowing him for this long, that surprised you. You broke eye contact with him before you stared long enough to decipher it, guilty that you might’ve taken things too far.

“Um, I mean. It’s only if you want to. I guess I should’ve asked if you had other plans.”

“NO. MY SILENCE IS THAT OF AWE, NOT DISAPPOINTMENT! NYEH HEH…I DID NOT KNOW WE WOULD BE EXCHANGING SURPRISES TODAY. I DID NOT PLAN ACCORDINGLY, AND I FEEL THAT YOUR POWER IS TRIUMPHING MINE. I…AM NOT VERY GOOD AT THIS.”

You furrowed your brows. Power? “Paps. I’m confused.”

The speaker crackled to life. “All competitors please report to section four!”

You both stood from your spot and you tentatively took his shaking hands at his sides, lacing your fingers with him and swinging his arms. He said you never had to ask to hug him, and he needed to be comforted. “You’re gonna do great.”

“YES. I AM!” He snapped out of his strange mood and raced past you, turning back just to strike a triumphant pose.

You settled in the bleachers, getting as close as you could to the floor. It was more crowded than you expected it to be.

Puzzles were a huge thing to monsters. It was an essential part of their culture. They used them primarily to get rid of humans before, but when they became more isolated and safer Underground, it became more tradition than anything. Papyrus in particular was excellent at creating and solving them, more so than most, and he actually found them enjoyable. Like a total dweeb. So of course you would support him in this. A showcase of his skills in the spotlight, where he would finally be appreciated for his critical mind and creativity? Hell yes.

Papyrus had an entire table to himself. The jigsaw puzzle was ten thousand pieces. Most people who entered were competing in groups, but this section was for monsters and humans that wanted to go through it alone.

It was a little silly, sure. But hey, it wasn’t like you could boast about solving something like this on your own. He was a special kind of dork.

A timer on the board began. Everyone dumped the pieces out onto the table and went crazy. It was a flurry of limbs and colored tiles, the crowd cheering as the solvers went to work. You ignored the rest of them, fixing your gaze on Papyrus. He hadn’t moved a muscle. He just…sat there, studying the pile with a hand on his chin.

The other contestants were making serious progress, with a monster taking the lead. They slapped down everything as if they’d completed it before, even though the brochure explicitly stated that the puzzles were created the same day of the competition. Wow, this was ridiculous. They were really going in on it. You felt nervous and looked over at Papyrus once more, only to see him fixated completely and tapping his lower jaw.

The counter hit the five-minute mark and Papyrus finally made his move.

You watched it come to life before your very eyes. The outline. The top portion. The bottom. It filled out into an incredible portrait of underwater life, coral and colorful fish springing up as he set every bit down. It started out as nothing but a blank canvas. But now he had nearly half of it done, beads of sweat running down his temple as he concentrated.

The other monster picked up their pace. They struggled. Made mistakes. Felt the pressure of the big, hunky skeleton sitting a few feet away. You couldn’t help yourself and cupped your hands over your mouth, shouting encouragement to Papyrus. You weren’t sure if he could hear it, but his process remained steady and true, everything coming together as it should have.

It took exactly fifty minutes for him to complete it.

When he set the last piece down, he tapped his buzzer and beamed at the judge who walked over to inspect his work. The judge held up a yellow card and the entire place went nuts.

The rest of the day was like that. Papyrus entered a competition, he swept through and mopped the floor with the others. People were so in awe of his skills, too. You never heard a single negative thing about him the entire time you shifted from room to room. And by the end of it, he even had his own tiny cheering section. No one seemed to know you came with him, but that was fine with you; the excessive attention would’ve annoyed the shit out of you.

It was the final event. Crossword puzzles. His one weakness. He’d been doing dozens of them to prepare. You found yourself a little worried. He was riding so high on all of his victories that losing this would absolutely crush him.

He took a sip of water and gripped the marker in his hand. There were four whiteboards set around the room, with a judge in the middle to oversee them all. They had on headphones to drown out the noise from the crowd and concentrate, with Papyrus’ a special set of earmuffs that seemed to cover up where he would be listening from. Monster anatomy was interesting. In each of their hands was a sheet of paper with the list of clues that they would work from as soon as the buzzer started.

You sat on the edge of your seat. Papyrus struggled with this. You could see it. He didn’t have that look of confidence any longer. People didn’t know that this wasn’t his strong suit, so they continued to wait for him to amaze them. Now that was fucked up. He did this because of his love for puzzles, not to impress someone. And definitely not to measure himself to complete strangers who couldn’t even compete, but just came to watch.

He wrote down answers and erased them, taking his time. His main competition, a young human girl with a high ponytail and glasses, scribbled things down and filled out the blank squares with precision. She was going to win this. Fuck, how were you going to console him?

It was down to the two of them. Both were stuck on the last word. Neither knew what to put. Papyrus wracked his brain and glanced at the crowd. You waved at him and tried to catch his attention, but he seemed to pass right over you. He returned to the board and put down his final answer, earning a hushed gasp from the crowd.

“Winner: Papyrus the Skeleton!”

Confetti rained down from the ceiling. This was the dorkiest thing you’d ever seen. The human girl dropped her shoulders, defeated, as the judges rushed up to congratulate him. Shaking his hand and clapping him on the back.

You came down from the bleachers to greet him. He was being crowded, so they had to keep a ring of space between him and his admirers, especially the young kids that had makeshift signs with his name on it. You laughed at the pure joy on his face, the bewilderment, how touched he was that so many came to rally for him.

You were content to watch him from the sidelines, but he wasn’t having it. He whipped around and scanned the sea of faces until he spotted you. He walked over and grabbed your hand, dragging you into the center where he was bequeathed a massive trophy.

“Paps, no!”

“I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT THIS, BUT IT IS A MOMENTOUS OCCASION!!! DO NOT WORRY!”

A couple of reporters stopped by and wanted to snap his picture. He slung his arm around you and held you close, the trophy in one hand and your waist in the other. With a charismatic wink and grin, their cameras flashed. You found yourself so concentrated on him that you didn’t even have time to protest.

When the media dispersed, you finally had a second to breathe. Everything flowed around you like water. He had a halo around him and you were enamored. You could barely find your balance, let alone your voice.

“You did it! Congratulations!”

“YOUR FAITH IN ME HELPED ME SOLVE THE FINAL PUZZLE!” He gushed. “THE WORD WAS PERSEVERANCE!”

Now that was a coincidence you could scarcely believe. You laughed until your cheeks hurt. “Are you serious?”

“OF COURSE I AM! THANK YOU, BESTIE.”

It took about half an hour for things to finally settle down enough for you to leave. For every inch you moved toward the door, another couple of people walked up to chat with you. Some wanted to know where he learned how to solve puzzles. Others were interested in his techniques. At one point he even shared a recipe for spaghetti with one of the bystanders.

But you made it out eventually. Out the doors, down the hallway, rounding the corner and finally making your way through the main doors. People still hung around the street and talked animatedly about all that they saw. Some were even wearing merchandise from inside the convention center, with every single nerdy reference you could imagine.

Papyrus hummed happily as you cut through the remnants of the spectators, his shiny new trophy glistening in the sunlight. You headed toward the car and he tucked it in the backseat, clicking in its seatbelt for safety.

“SO! WHERE IS THIS PASTA SHOP, MY TRUSTED CO-PILOT?”

“I’m glad you remembered. Take a left up here.”

Now that you were far enough away from the convention center, you could actually appreciate more of the city. Monsters and humans mingling on the streets, eating lunch together and taking leisurely walks. Some of them even…holding hands. Being romantic. It was really nice, actually. Seeing people so unafraid to follow their dreams and their hearts. Ugh, that sounded so sappy, but it made you wonder if maybe…

“OOH! LOOK OVER THERE! IS THAT THE PLACE?”

You shot him a look. “Nice try. That’s an ice cream shop.”

“OH? MAYBE WE SHOULD GO THERE, TOO. I KNOW HOW MUCH YOU ENJOY SWEET THINGS.”

“Gosh, you’re right. Probably why I like you so much.”

His eyes bulged comically. “NO! YOUR POWER! IT’S TOO GREAT!!!”

The store wasn’t so bad. Sure, it was busy, but that was to be expected. You parked at the back of the place because Papyrus insisted that you stretch your legs and let people with difficulties have the front spaces. You were totally cool with that; you didn’t mind a little side trip. You did your best to keep up with his pace, the excitement apparent from his rattling bones and dopey grin.

Papyrus grabbed a massive cart as you headed inside. The monster greeter gave you a brief tour of where everything was. You didn’t waste any time, the skelebro practically skipping down the aisle as you headed to the various rows and rows of noodles.

“THIS IS THE BEST PLACE EVER!!! I WISH WE HAD ONE IN OUR CITY.”

“Me, too. It would be a lot more convenient for all of your cooking needs. Hey, maybe we can take a trip down here every month.”

“I THINK THAT IS A FANTASTIC IDEA!!! NYEH HEH HEH, THIS IS WHY YOU AND I GET ALONG SO WELL!”

The pasta bar was a little too busy for your tastes, so you decided to wait it out. In the meantime, you rolled on over to the next aisle. Were the noodles alphabetized? What was their system? You squinted and grabbed the nearest packaging, an idea forming in your head.

“Hey, Paps. Close your eyes.”

“OKAY.” He sounded unsure of himself, but so quick to trust you regardless. “WHAT ARE YOU DOING? IS THERE ANOTHER SURPRISE? A SURPRISE PARTY?! GASP! HAVE YOU INVITED ALL OF OUR FRIENDS HERE TO CELEBRATE MY VICTORY???”

“No, no. Sorry.” He had such an active imagination.  “Now hold out your hands.”

He released the cart and did as you asked. You placed a box in his grip and waited for a brief moment.

“Alright. What kind of pasta is it?”

He balanced it for a moment, bobbing his arm up and down. “ANGEL HAIR.”

No fucking way. “Oh my god. This is amazing! You got it right!”

“OF COURSE. IT IS IM-PASTA-BLE TO STUMP ME!!!”

You both giggled at his pun. Sans would have been so proud. Contrary to popular belief, Papyrus did sometimes like making them. He just really didn’t enjoy the sheer volume and…lack of finesse that Sans had when sharing his own.

“This one?”

“HMM.” He hummed to himself and shifted his weight from his left leg to his right. “AM I ALLOWED TO SHAKE IT?”

“Sure, do whatever you like. Except no peeking!”

“I UNDERSTAND. THAT WOULD MAKE THE GUESSING MOOT.” He shook the box hard enough to hear it rattle inside, his bones mimicking the sound. “OH. I KNOW! BOW TIES!”

“Dude, you really _are_ a master.”

“AT NOODLES, YES.”

“Aaaaand canoodles.”

“PLANOODLES, TOO?”

“Hell yeah.”

By the end of the last aisle, you had probably over a hundred bucks worth of noodles. Sans was going to have a heart attack if you let Papyrus use his own card. You weren’t going to do that to him, as hilarious as it would’ve been. So despite Papyrus’ polite protests, the bill was on you. It was the least you could do to celebrate his ridiculous victory at the Puzzle Championship.

“SO TONIGHT WE SHOULD USE SOME OF THESE! WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE?”

“Mmm…I vote linguine.”

“A VERY GOOD CHOICE. I WILL LOOK UP RECIPES WHEN WE GET HOME!”

It was so much easier getting out of the city. Papyrus’ trophy was locked up tight, you had a backseat full of groceries, and it was still so pleasant outside that you could close your eyes and soak in the warmth. You and Papyrus spent the next hour trading secrets about yourselves, seeing as how he was still giddy about what you shared at Toriel’s dinner a few weeks ago.

You turned into the familiar driveway and yawned, stretching your arms high above your head. “Time to unload!”

“WELL, I WILL DO MY BEST TO GET IT ALL IN ONE GO! OH, I KNOW! I CAN HOLD YOU ON TOP OF MY SHOULDERS AND WE CAN STACK EVEN MORE THAT WAY.”

You snorted with laughter. “Wait, what? That doesn’t even make sense.”

“WE CAN GET IT DONE IN ONE TRIP! YOU CARRY AS MANY AS YOU CAN, THEN I WILL CARRY YOU AND THE REST! EASY!”

“Paps, like, I know you’re strong, but that’s a lot. Don’t forget what happened in the pool, you almost passed out from keeping me on top, and that was in the water.”

He waited until you piled bags along your arms to lift you above his shoulders. You shrieked out of surprise and sucked in a sharp breath, your stomach lurching when he settled you there. You were so high up. This was really fucked up!!! You almost lost your grip on the bags until you got a hold of yourself, hooking your legs underneath his armpits so you would be able to keep hold on him.

“SEE? IT IS NOT WEIRD AT ALL.”

“Papyrus! I’m gonna fall!”

“DO NOT BE SO DRAMATIC. THIS IS FINE. WE ARE FINE!!!” He shut the car door, seemingly unperturbed with your full weight resting on his shoulders. “NOW ALL WE HAVE TO DO IS GET INSIDE AND WE WILL HAVE MAXIMUM TIME TO SPEND TOGETHER!”

Ahhh, so that was what this was about. He just wanted more one-on-one time with you. That was completely adorable. He cut corners in his chores to make sure you would be able to hang out longer. You felt more at ease with that tidbit of information and calmed your nerves, relaxing your body so you weren’t going to choke the life out of him.

“IT IS A GOOD THING WE HAVE SUCH TALL DOORWAYS. BETWEEN ME AND UNDYNE, IT WAS A MUST!”

“You guys are pretty big. Did living Underground ever make you feel claustrophobic?”

“NOT ME! I AM VERY GOOD AT MAINTAINING MY DISCOMFORTS AND FEARS. HOWEVER, TINY HOUSES WERE NOT ONE OF THEM. I WAS LUCKY ENOUGH TO HAVE A PLACE THAT FIT ME! AND I MODIFIED WHAT WAS INCONVENIENT!”

“Oh yeah, like your sink.”

“CORRECT. WOWIE, IT HAS BEEN A LONG TIME SINCE I THOUGHT OF OUR PLACE UNDERGROUND. IT WAS VERY COZY. BUT THIS HOME IS FAR MORE INTERESTING! MUCH MORE FITTING FOR US.”

He set you down in the kitchen. Your arms were numb from gripping the bags so tight, so you deposited them on the counter as soon as you could. Papyrus actually didn’t seem as flustered this time around. He just opened up the shopping bags he tied neatly and began to store everything away in their respective spots.

“Hey, while you’re prepping for dinner, I’m gonna put on some music!”

“AMAZING!!! SURPRISE ME WITH YOUR MUSICAL EXPERTISE!”

That was a vote of confidence you weren’t sure you deserved. Still, the both of you made a game out of putting everything away. He would stand off on the opposite side of the room while you tossed the bags his way. He was a pretty good juggler, actually, and would send them flying into the exact cupboard that he needed them to be. Arms a windmill of precision, he never dropped a single one.

“THIS IS ONE OF THOSE SLOW SONGS THAT UNDYNE TALKED ABOUT!”

You listened to the track for a few seconds. “I can change it if you want.”

“NO, I LIKE IT!!! IT’S SOOTHING. SHE WAS NERVOUS BECAUSE SHE WANTED TO SLOW DANCE WITH ALPHYS, BUT WAS AFRAID SHE WOULD STEP ON HER TOES.”

That sounded like her. “She’s got serious finesse on the battlefield, though. Why was she worried?”

“BECAUSE AFFAIRS OF THE HEART ARE NOT THE SAME AS BEATING PEOPLE UP. OUR RESEARCH MATERIAL SAID THAT SHE NEEDED TO BE GENTLE AND SUAVE, TWO THINGS WHICH SHE IS…NOT VERY GOOD AT.”

You laughed. “How blunt of you, Paps!”

“WELL IT IS TRUE. I HAD TO SHOW HER HOW IT WAS DONE WITH MY OWN SUPER RADICAL MOVES.”

“Wait, you taught her how to dance?” Your jaw dropped. “No way. Did she end up succeeding?”

“YES. SHE AND ALPHYS DANCED ON THE ANNIVERSARY OF THEIR FIRST DATE!!! I AM SO GLAD MY SUPERIOR TEACHING WAS NOT WASTED.”

He stopped fumbling with the controls on the stovetop and turned toward you. He squinted.

“ARE YOU…INTERESTED IN LEARNING FROM ME?”

You stammered, heat rising to your cheeks. “W-what? I mean, I’m sure you’re a wonderful dancer. But we’re in the middle of making dinner, and…”

“NONSENSE. THE WATER MUST BOIL FIRST. IN THE MEANTIME, I WILL SHOW YOU ALL OF THE THINGS THAT I HAVE PASSED ON TO MY SEMI-SUCCESSFUL PUPIL!” He approached you with his hand outstretched, hope etched across his usually predictable features. “WILL YOU HONOR THE GREAT PAPYRUS AND MASTER PUZZLE SOLVER WITH THIS DANCE?”

When he put it that way…no, you were still afraid.

You scrambled backwards and nervous laughter bubbled in your throat. “I-I’ll take your word for it!”

“YOU COULD ALSO TAKE MY HAND.”

“I-I don’t want to step on your feet!”

“YOURS ARE VERY SMALL AND DAINTY, THEY WOULD NOT DO ANY DAMAGE WHATSOEVER! NOT COMPARED TO UNDYNE’S HEAVY STOMPING, ANYWAY…SHE MAY OR MAY NOT HAVE CRIPPLED ME TEMPORARILY…I MAY BE NUMB TO MINOR INJURIES…SO I WOULD NOT WORRY ABOUT IT!”

“U-Um, isn’t the water burning…?”

He came close enough to reach down and grasp your hands, which you’d set down near your hips in defense. You stared, half in wonder and half in fear, begging him not to do this.

Despite your protests, a small part of you wanted to continue. So he went with it anyway, lifting your arm just enough where he could pose your hand in his, the other resting against your shoulder blade. You reluctantly placed your free hand on his shoulder, the space between you ebbing away. You ended up flush with him, chest to chest, gazing up at him and wondering just how he managed to trick you into being so close.

“SEE? THIS IS NOT AS BAD AS YOU THOUGHT IT WOULD BE.”

“We haven’t even moved yet,” you sputtered.

He took that as an opportunity to guide you into doing just that. You held in your breath as he pushed your arm back, causing you to step backwards. He was graceful. Gentle. Leading you wherever he wanted, his steps careful and calculated, yet flowing along with the soft beats of the music around you.

You weren’t sure why you were so scared. Not when he was like this. Considerate of where you were, taking things slow, stepping all around the kitchen and gazing at you so intensely. His grip on you was steady enough to lead you, but not painful or unpleasant. It was actually the opposite. A gentle buzz down your spine and a shiver that lingered on the back of your neck, your lips parting as you felt that unfamiliar urge to kiss him. Anywhere. Maybe on his jaw. Or the slope of his neck.

You swayed to the beat and he made a move to turn you. You’d never done it before, so you were sure that it was sloppy, but he didn’t seem deterred in the slightest. He spun you as slow as you needed to go, drawing it out as you ended up a few feet away. He pulled you back to him, settling you to where you were skin to bone, a triumphant yet soft smile etched on his features.

“YOU ARE DOING VERY WELL.”

“I do have an amazing teacher,” you admitted, turning your face to rest it on his chest. There was no heartbeat, but at this proximity you could hear the soft hum of magic all around him.

The second the song ended, there was this brief moment. A time where a thousand thoughts came into your head, but they all agreed on one thing: you wanted to take the plunge. You fixated on his mouth and the possibilities, a thousand ways this could end. He could laugh it off, he could be outright offended, you could ruin everything by a simple gesture. There was also a chance he would be fine with it, that he would want this. That he would reciprocate.

But the anxieties piled up and screamed in your head. The doubts reverberated across your eardrums long enough for you to pull back. To recoil.

You separated and Papyrus released his grip on you, turning toward the pot on the stove. It bubbled and hissed as the water poured onto the burner.

“NO!!! IT IS BURNING!”

You choked out a laugh as he rushed to fix it, the regret already seeping into your conscious.

The rest of the night you ate pasta and watched terrible movies. It was good. It was fun. You were still on edge at your cowardice, but his company made you forget about it for small pockets of time.

You had to get home, though. Work tomorrow. Papyrus had some meetings to attend with Toriel, too. Which meant that it would be a while before you could do something like this.

You walked up the path to your apartment. You held the tupperware full of leftovers, the dying warmth of the pasta a welcome feeling against your cold hands. You were so busy mulling over the events of the day that you hadn’t noticed you were right outside your door.

“THANK YOU FOR ACCOMPANYING ME TO THE PUZZLE COMPETITION. SANS WILL BE VERY HAPPY TO SEE THE TROPHY I WON. PERHAPS HE WILL EVEN BE MOTIVATED ENOUGH TO GET HIS OWN!”

“I don’t think so. But it definitely proves who’s the cooler brother. Don’t tell him I said that.”

He made a zipping motion across his mouth, eyes alight with amusement. “I WOULD NEVER BREAK YOUR CONFIDENCE! THAT IS WHAT BESTIES ARE FOR.”

“I know. I can always trust you, Paps.”

His smile faded and beads of sweat pooled at his temple. “C-CAN YOU?”

“Yes.”

“REALLY?”

“Of course. Why? Is there something you want to tell me?” Oh no. What happened? Someone must have fucking done something to him. And he was withholding it from everyone. You were a fucking terrible friend, why hadn’t you noticed it before?

“NO. SOMETHING I WOULD LIKE TO…DO.”

That was weird. “Um. Alright?”

He reached a hand up, placed it on your cheek, and leaned down.

Fuck fuck _FUCK FUCK FUCK_ **FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK**!!!

You shoved him away from you. Not hard, but enough that he stopped midway through the gesture. Papyrus stumbled backwards, his hurt expression sending a sharp pain through your chest. You put your face in your hands and shrank into yourself. Bells sounded off in your head and your skin screamed.

“I-I AM SORRY!” He sounded like he was going to break down and cry. You couldn’t see him, but you just knew that you’d wounded him. “I SHOULD NOT HAVE…I AM SORRY!!!”

You heard him break from the balcony where you were and run down the stairs. His feet hit the pavement as he darted for his car. It took about two seconds for him to start it up before he raced out of the parking lot. His tires squealed and left skid marks in their wake.

When he was out of sight, you realized what you’d done. You sank down to sit in front of the door, a dry sob keening in your throat.


	2. Rapid Rebuke

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You had a bad feeling about tonight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this series updates **tuesdays and fridays**!
> 
> like my fics? you could always [leave me a tip](https://ko-fi.com/A258IM)!

“What rhymes with…cassette?”

“Regret.”

“Yeah, that’s what I’m feeling.”

Ro laughed, handing the headphones over to you. “You’re way too hard on yourself.”

“I know, but…no, it was bad. Picture this: a super fun day. A romantic dance in the kitchen. He drives me home and walks me to the doorstep. He goes in for the kiss, and I just…push him away. I don’t even just turn my head away or tell him to stop. I put my hands on him. And physically force him back.”

They sighed and turned down the volume on the mp3 player. “Well…I’m not gonna sugarcoat it. That _is_ pretty bad.”

You groaned and rubbed at your eyes, sinking into the couch. You’d been hanging out for just a few hours, but you were already so done. You wanted to return to your room, curl up into the covers and slowly die. You were such an asshole. Not even Ro’s amazing tracks swimming with their literally magical voice could do anything to brighten your mood.

“Why’d you push him away? I thought you liked him.”

“I _do_. And I _don’t know_. I panicked. I saw him coming down and it just felt wrong. I felt sick. Not the way you think. It was instinctual. I didn’t want him to give me affection, but at the same time, I definitely did. I wanted to kiss him, but then when he made the move, I just…”

It was so hard to explain to someone without touch aversion. Every way you worded it sounded silly.

“I reacted. I pushed him away because there was one part of me that uncomfortable, and another that thought to myself that I didn’t…that he shouldn’t be doing it to me. Or…that it was some kind of sick joke. That the easiest thing to do was just to run away…again.”

Ro hummed a tiny tune and fumbled with the knob. Their music drowned out the rest of the negative thoughts that lingered on your tongue, the lights in their room dimming with the warm beats. They’d picked this to calm your nerves while they worked on mixing something in their makeshift studio, so it was the least you could do to at least try and listen.

You closed your eyes and replayed the scene over and over in your head. How vulnerable he looked. The half-lidded expression. His inhibitions lowered by his own devices, the way he went to stroke your cheek with his finger, the flutter of your lashes as your eyes flickered shut.

Then the warning. The overwhelming feeling that caused you to lash out. The mantra in your head that said you didn’t deserve this, that you didn’t want this after all, that he made a mistake in even trying. The way that you put so much effort into getting him away from you, pushing away another chance that stared you right in the face because you were so fucked up you couldn’t do any differently.

The realization that Papyrus wanted to kiss you was dwarfed by that experience entirely. You’d fucked up something that could have been good, could have been incredible. Something that could have changed your life.

To your relief and great surprise, Undyne hadn’t knocked down your door to throttle you. Alphys hadn’t texted you to meet up so you could have a “friendly” chat. And you never even received vague threats from Sans in the guise of a pun. It was…a little weird. You weren’t sure how to face any of them after what happened, so you pretended to be too busy for any of your regular hangouts.

This was what you’d decided to do. Instead of own up to your own cowardice and explain what happened, you pulled back. You withdrew from the people that cared about you to punish yourself.

“If you need to talk, you can always call.”

“Thanks, Ro. I’ll be sure to do that.” Not gonna happen. “See you later!”

You trudged out of their place and lingered on the sidewalk. They lived in the more densely populated part of town with the majority of the monster population. Everywhere around you were familiar faces and an inviting atmosphere, but you still felt sick to your stomach.

You didn’t want to explain yourself any more.

For the first time in what felt like years, you let yourself into your house and relished the silence. Usually you’d only stopped in to change or grab something to eat. With friends like that dorky group of yours, they never really gave you a chance for alone time. Either they were on your couch, texting you up a storm, or chatting on the phone.

You sank down on the edge of your bed and tore your shoes off. Your whole body ached. You hadn’t slept very well these past few nights, and when you did doze off, you always ended up in a position that had your muscles screaming by the time you woke up. It would be nice to shower and at least try to ease some of the tension. Warm water against your skin would do wonders.

Cranking up the water to the highest temperature you could stand, you put on some music and stepped in, the steam clearing your head and giving you the chance to concentrate.

You knew something for certain.

You had…feelings for Sans and Papyrus. Every type of attraction that you could think of.

Aesthetic? That was easy. Both of them were so fascinating. Not in the weird, overly clinical type of way. But you loved little things about them. The dimples in Sans’ cheekbones. His mischievous grin. Papyrus’ broad chest and hands just the perfect size for swathing around your waist. Both of them weren’t just skeletons; they were monsters. They were cloaked in magic and mystery, something incredible and fantastical in equal measure.

Romantic? Done and done. You had so much fun spending time with them. You’d held their hands on multiple occasions and it was…nice. Good. It gave you a pleasant rush, like you’d just taken a long drink of wine. You liked their hugs: Papyrus, arms wrapped tight and nearly lifting you off your feet. Sans, encasing you completely with his impossible warmth. You could see yourself going out on dates. Maybe doing little cutesy couple things. In public. Some minor displays of affection. With practice, of course.

Sexual?

…yeah. About that.

When you appreciated them aesthetically, it was good. They were both attractive in their own ways. But sexual attraction was the type that still scared you, that unnerved you. It was few and far between that you’d experienced something like this, and it was…difficult to let things go once it didn’t work out. You expected to be disappointed. To not have feelings reciprocated and…it was so hard to think of yourself as sexually viable when you had zero self-esteem.

Could you imagine doing things like that with them?

Damn. It was so fucked up. Was it? Was it gross to sit there and fantasize about your best friends while they were completely unaware?

You let the rivulets of water run down the slope of your nose and chest. Curiosity got the better of you. You brought your hands to the swell of your breasts, cupping them gently. Working your way down your waist and pinching at your lovehandles, sweeping the pads of your fingers along your hips and to your fleshy thighs.

Your body was so different from theirs. If they were interested, if they wanted to…wouldn’t their expectations be that of what was in the media? If they did their own research, if they wanted to learn more about humans, then wouldn’t they be disappointed building up this whole fantasy and realizing you didn’t quite stack up the way they envisioned? Sure, they had seen plenty of you during your beach and pool parties, but that was different. That was between friends.

You withdrew your explorative touch and scrubbed away the lingering remnants of soap, your skin angry at the sudden shift in pressure. Neither of them had said anything. You were entertaining fantasies. Again. Because that was so much easier than dealing in the present, coming to terms with what was in front of you. You’d fucked up a perfectly good chance to express yourself to Papyrus and now he was going to think that you weren’t interested.

You definitely were.

How much longer would he be willing to wait? Not long enough. Even with the stark realization that maybe he held something more for you than just your standard, run-of-the-mill friendship, it still wasn’t going to be enough to spur you into action. How fucking pathetic was that?

And on top of that, you felt guilty. Guilty that you had these complex feelings for both of the brothers. Like, how greedy were you? Wasn’t it enough that you had one interested in you? You had no problem with other people being in polyamorous relationships, but they were _brothers_. It felt so wrong to harbor something for each one and then expect to have those wishes met.

Did they even know? If they did, then would you be okay with just going out with one? If Sans just backed off because he wanted his brother to be happy, and you were stuck wondering if you’d made the “right” decision between the two? Wasn’t that selfish as fuck?

You stepped out and the steam wafted from behind the sliding doors. You were just as miserable as before.

When you headed to your room to get dressed, your phone buzzed and the ringtone sounded off. Great. What now? You glanced at the screen just long enough to catch sight of the selfie you’d taken of the two of you together, grins on your faces. It was one of the few photos you actually liked of yourself.

“Tori?”

“Oh! You picked up! Hello! I was wondering if you fell asleep again.” She chuckled on the other end. “I wanted to make sure you were ready for tonight.”

“Tonight?” You glanced at the calendar near your door and sucked in a sharp intake of breath. Today’s date circled in red with about a thousand exclamation marks. “Fuck. I’m sorry, it’s been a rough week. I forgot.”

“Do not worry, my friend. I…will have to make a few phonecalls to see if I can scrounge up a substitute.”

“No, no.” You cursed yourself for being such a fucking prick. You were the worst friend ever. “I can make it. I just hopped out of the shower. I’ll get ready and be down there in about an hour.”

“Thank you! I have been looking forward to seeing you. We will meet you at the front gates. Goodbye!”

She hung up and you  squeezed your eyes shut, setting the phone down on your bed. Well. Change of plans. Instead of throwing on some pajamas and curling up on the couch, you were heading out.

Great.

You stood outside the carnival with a plastic smile and a crooked nametag. This was probably the last place you wanted to be. You felt like shit and it was going to be crowded as fuck in there. And the entire time you had to stop worrying about your hangups just long enough to pay close attention to the rambunctious group that was sure to show up any minute.

“Daury!”

The little monster girl galloped toward you with her eyes narrowed. She threw up a magical barrier before you could think twice, something shattering against it in an explosion of water and rubber. You gaped at the destroyed balloon and felt equal parts of fear and astonishment.

“No fair!” Ebby snapped, having caught his breath as he rushed up to you. “You cheated!”

She stuck her tongue out at him and lobbed another balloon, spraying him right in the face.

Toriel was in stitches by the time she got to you. It was good to see her let loose once in a while. She paused just long enough to greet you before she burst into laughter again, the children following suit.

“You guys ready to go in?” you asked, glancing around at the sea of kids. Tonight’s group was twenty of them. Just enough for you to have a mini heart attack when you entered.

“Just one moment. We are waiting for the other two.” Toriel glanced over her shoulder and nodded toward the hill behind you.

You gazed down the horizon and your stomach sank. Oh, fuck. Just the two people you did not want to see. Sans and Papyrus. Both of them were in the same getup you were, though the shorter of the skelebros had their name spelled backwards on their lapel. Papyrus had on what looked to be a crossing guard uniform, the neon yellow and orange vest just bright enough to stand out against the colorful backdrop of the rides and stands behind you.

You had to get out of here. You didn’t sign up for this. Toriel said you were just going to be a chaperone, not that you were going to spend the entire night suffering in silence because you were fighting off terrifying and confusing feelings!

“Thank you for making sure the car was locked.” She turned toward you and you caught the faintest glint in her eyes.

That sneaky little…she did this. On purpose. Somehow she’d figured it out, and here she was, trying to get you all to work it out. You never mentioned anything to her. Neither did Sans, that was for sure, not since she ratted him out about the interest in human courtship. And Papyrus? No way. She somehow recognized that you weren’t in the right place with them and decided to intervene in the sneakiest way possible.

You weren’t sure if you wanted to throttle her or commend her for fooling you yet again.

“yep. looks like we’re ready to go.” Sans flicked his gaze to you, pinpricks of light trained on your panicked expression. “good to see ya. tori didn’t think you’d be able to make it.”

Wait. So they knew you would be here…? You frowned. You didn’t think they would want to be within three feet of you with the way you’d been acting.

“BESTIE, I AM GLAD YOU ARE WEARING THE PROPER ATTIRE!” Papyrus gestured to your nametag. “SANS HAS DECIDED TO MAKE A MOCKERY OF THE ORDER. WE WILL SHOW HIM HOW TO ACT AND PERHAPS HE WILL PICK UP ON OUR TOTALLY COOL, NOT DORKY CONDUCT! THIS IS FOR THE CHILDREN, SANS.”

“they’re more at risk ending up like you two.”

“INCREDIBLY HEROIC AND SAFE?”

“nah. a couple of dorks.”

“WE ARE NOT DORKS!!!! I ALREADY ESTABLISHED THAT.” He beamed at you. “WELL? SHALL WE GO INSIDE? I AM EXCITED TO SEE THIS!”

You gaped at his attitude. You…weren’t sure what you expected, but he wasn’t acting weird at all. You weren’t sure if you were disappointed or relieved. Maybe a bit of both. “Y-yeah. Let’s head on in. We’ve got quite a while before the kids need to go bed, so we can check out a lot…”

“We don’t have a bedtime! We’re staying up FOREVER!”

“THAT IS THE SPIRIT, FRAM. I AM SO PROUD OF YOU.”

The guy at the front stamped each of your hands. The kids begged him to place more of the inky smiley faces on their arms and face, but Toriel intervened and pushed them inside. You forked over some cash to get yourself inside, paying for the skelebros without even thinking twice.

“WOWIE. HUMAN CUSTOMS SURE ARE STRANGE. WHAT IS THE PURPOSE OF THIS HAPPY STAMP?”

“In case we leave, we can come right back in without paying. And they check to make sure that people haven’t snuck in without paying, too.”

“I SEE. IT IS INGENIOUS! A FITTING, FUN WAY TO DETER CRIME. I FEEL AS THOUGH I SHOULD BE TAKING NOTES.”

The carnival itself was in full swing. The crowds were immense, people moving back and forth while marveling at each of the games, food stands and rides. It was dark enough where the lights kicked on, the bright, flashing neon and fluorescent bulbs that lit up the sky. You gazed at the mix of people, monsters and humans alike, tufts of cotton candy bobbing in children’s hands as their pockets jangled with coins.

“wow. this is busier than i thought it’d be.” Sans glanced over at one of the food trucks parked in the middle of the lot. “wonder if anyone uh, needs help.”

“ABSOLUTELY NOT. YOU ARE ON THE CLOCK RIGHT NOW! AND IT IS OUR DUTY TO SUPERVISE TORIEL’S CHILDREN. OR ELSE SHE WILL BE DISAPPOINTED IN US.” He started to sweat. “AND THAT IS A FATE WORSE THAN DEATH!!!”

You all split up. You wanted to be as far away from the brothers as possible, so you slipped away with your own group of kids when their backs were turned. Each of you had five kids to watch over, so it wasn’t so bad. Toriel had the common courtesy to give you the most well-behaved and mild-mannered of the brats, with Locques at your side to deter any bad ideas from potential troublemakers.

You weren’t one for places like this. It was just…whew. A lot to take in all at once. You showed up in something to help with the stifling heat of both the weather and bodies crammed in such a small space, which made you feel about ten times more awkward than you should have.

At least the kids were having fun. You appointed Locques as leader and the five of them collaborated together to decide their entire schedule for the evening. What a bunch of nerds. If Undyne were here, she would’ve noogied all of them. Or bench-pressed them. Maybe both.

“What’s that over there?”

“COOL!”

You stopped midstep and peered across the sea of people gathered at the stadium. There was a long line trying to squeeze into the concert area, which was…interesting to see, actually. Monsters and humans chatted with each other and pointed at the massive screen just outside the main gate. It showed a live video feed of the stage where a group started to set up their equipment.

“We should’ve signed up when we first got here!” A monster slime girl shoved her companion, who huffed and blew a thick strand of hair out of her face. “All the slots are full now!”

“Ugh, sorry! I was trying to size up the competition!”

“You were flirting with them!”

The kids were interested enough. They took the time to settle in front of the TV, eyes glued. It was weird. You could see what was going on, like you were just watching a program, but the distant cheering and thunderous chants from just inside the arena overpowered everything else.

Seats were open for anyone and everyone, which meant that you had a small chance to see things in action. You knew that most kids were antsy and their attention span would trickle away probably ten minutes into the show, but this was a big hurrah for them passing all their classes and their first official day of summer break. So you sucked it up and asked them if they wanted to head in, which granted you a unanimous chorus of “yes”.

You managed to score an entire row to yourselves. It was pretty much toward the back of the arena, but hey. They didn’t seem to mind. The kids were more entertained with the idea of having popcorn and drinks served to them, which you of course had to shell out for yourself.

The lights dimmed as the next act started up. It was a monster and human pop duo. The songs they performed were really cutesy and had the crowd chanting with easy to remember lyrics, which everyone enjoyed. It took a lot of fucking guts to be up there, with all eyes on them, belting their hearts out. Even if they weren’t the best (which, hey, they were pretty good), then you would still give them props for putting themselves out there.

You slipped away just for a second to answer your phone call from Toriel. You couldn’t hear her voice over the thunderous applause.

“Are you there? Where are you?”

“Hanging out with the kids at the concert. You been on any rides yet?”

“Oh, no. It is actually quite difficult finding some that will accommodate my size.” She chuckled. “I am just checking in! We should meet up for dinner in about an hour or so.”

“Gotcha. Text me where you’d want to go and I’ll bring ‘em around. Have fun!”

You hung up and nearly jolted out of your skin when you saw a familiar face in front of you. “Ro! What’re you doing here?”

“Pfthahaha! The look on your face!” They grinned. “Hey, I didn’t think I’d see you here. When I said I had a gig, I didn’t expect you to show up.”

“Oh, shit. _This_ is where you’re playing? That’s awesome! I’m actually here watching some of Toriel’s students.” You tapped your badge. “Official babysitter.”

“I’ve got an idea. You should come see me perform.”

“Sure. I’ll stick around. I’ve got a place inside.”

They shook their head. “No, I mean, front row! It’s my set. You’re a friend. No one’s gonna care. Bring the kids along. Actually, I’ll have security bring ‘em up. Come with me.”

You didn’t have time to protest. They’d reached down for your hand but you snatched it away with a quick apology, using one of your age-old excuses to get out of close contact. They didn’t seem to mind.

You felt uncomfortable at the thought of leaving the kids, but Ro reassured you that the security guard would take good care of them. When you happened to glance over at the entrance to the seating section, you did notice that the monster they put in charge was, in fact, the mother of one of the kids. She waved at you. That made you feel a lot better.

So here you were. Standing just off stage, near the curtains and fog machines. Ro actually got a few of their friends together to perform. Their equipment looked incredible; it was obvious that all of them loved what they did and were passionate about it.

Ro stepped up to the mic. As soon as the bass started thrumming behind them, they opened their mouth and let out a series of wavering notes.

Damn. The entire crowd lit up at their voice. You had to admit, you’d never heard anything like it. Something about it was just…intense. Combined with the lightshow and special effects, it was hard not to gape at their performance. They thrived under the limelight. The way that they moved and flowed like water, glittering under the night sky with a slight glow to their already ephemeral features.

There was a pause in Ro’s singing and they stepped over to you. You watched them for a moment, not fully registering what they were doing, until they had you out on the stage in front of thousands of eyes.

You watched your own mortified expression on the projected screen. You heard screams of encouragement from the group of kids you were watching, with Locques cheering the loudest.

Ro led you out into the bright lights that nearly blinded you as they picked up where they left off. Magic thrummed through your body and sent it into a tingle, something faint leaving the aftertaste of sugar on your tongue. You couldn’t tear your eyes off them.

The sounds of the crowd faded. A distant garbling resounded in your ears instead. Colors muted. The tips of your fingers seared. Something spiked inside of you, an icy hot bubble popping in your chest, a sudden jerk that made your breath catch in your throat.

Then it was over. Ro separated from you, turned their back to your flushed face, and thanked the sea of standing ovations before them.

You met the group back out near the gates. All of them were buzzing with excitement, laughing and pushing each other as you walked along the path. You couldn’t think straight. Everything seemed too real, your senses hyperaware, your head aching at the base of your neck. You had to stop and pick up a ridiculously overpriced bottle of water and sit quietly for a few minutes to gather yourself.

After a while, the side effects of the song, like the lyrics written across your eyelids, faded. You felt much better than before, if a little dizzy, and asked the kids what they would like to do next.

Locques tugged on your hand. He always wanted to be as close to you as possible when you were in public. “Can we play darts?”

“Sure, why not.” Toriel bought a day pass for each of them so they could go onto as many attractions as they wanted, but you would be the one to pay for rigged games. It was a good thing you’d picked up some extra hours at work. “All of you?”

They bustled with excitement. You walked up to the stand, narrowly avoiding people who were all over the sidewalk and road. In big places like this, no one gave a single fuck about common courtesy. They didn’t adhere to the flow of traffic; it was every man for themselves.

“Aw, Sans! You could’ve gotten it that time!”

“sorry, kiddo. looks like i _missed the mark._ ”

“If you put as much effort into your aim as your puns, you woulda won us the giant giraffe balloon!”

“ouch. tough crowd.”

You snorted with laughter despite yourself. Sans winked at you while the children raged around him. There were just enough seats for everyone to switch off in pairs, so the two of you made sure to keep an eye on them while the operator greedily snatched away their money.

“glad you came. tori said you were havin’ second thoughts.”

You frowned at his forwardness. “Yeah. A lot’s been going on lately. I needed a break.”

“i get that. not much time to yourself. everyone needs to recharge. by the way, me n’ paps saw you up there on stage with ro. nice.”

“Oh, yeah, haha.” Your voice trembled. This was so awkward. “That was…interesting.”

He stuffed his hands in his jacket pockets. It was a light hoodie for tonight, though you weren’t sure how he could stand it with all of this body heat around you. Oh, nope. There he went, dabbing at his forehead with his handkerchief. It was a mystery to you how skeletons could even sweat, but you just chalked it up to magic. It was a safe explanation for a lot of things.

“look. i’m not the type to pry, but…” He hesitated. “if somethin’ happened, you know i’d listen. right?”

Your stomach clenched. Fuck. So he did notice. Of course he did. He was intelligent as hell and perceptive to boot.

“Sans, I don’t know what to do,” you bit your lip, nervousness crawling through your entire body. “I hurt Papyrus’ feelings. Did he tell you?”

“nah. he’s uh…good at pretending to be okay. not a very healthy habit, but it’s just what he does. i’m not gonna ask what happened. that’s between the two of ya. but i will say this…whatever it is, it ain’t enough to break a friendship up.”

That got you. Like, really bad. You rubbed at your eyes to hide the fact that you were tearing up. Sans had the decency to look away, pretending to be hyper-fixated on the babbling children.

“I don’t even know what to say. What to do. I can’t just corner him.”

“don’t worry. i gotchya covered.”

You weren’t sure what he meant, but you gave him the benefit of the doubt. You trusted him, you did. You just weren’t sure how he could fix things the way that they were. And you wondered if you were overstepping your boundaries in telling him about all this.

“Hey! No monsters allowed, kid.”

What the fuck was that? You tore yourself from your conversation and scanned the perimeter, on edge. Looking for anyone that looked threatening. Humans and monsters got along just fine most places, but there were still offenders. Those who couldn’t keep up with the times.

You realized where it came from when you saw Daury shrink from her seat at the stand. She couldn’t even meet your eyes. You followed her trail of unshed tears to the man that was trying hard to get her to split.

“What the hell did I just say?”

The sound of the owner’s voice sent a chill down your spine. He meant business.

Normally you wouldn’t be the type to pick fights, but you were feeling some type of way. No one was going to ruin these kids’ night, not even some beefy carnival operator.

“She can play if she wants to, I already paid for it.”

He sneered at you and flicked his dying cigarette into your face. You flinched at the motion, but the tiny object suspended in midair just as soon as you had a chance to think about what he’d done.

Sans stood next to you, his eye glowing, a downright murderous grin on his face.

“hey there, pal. let’s keep this nice n’ easy. wouldn’t want your place to _go up in smoke._ ”

“Are you fucking threatening me?” He loomed over the counter, the veins in his neck bulging. “I said. No. Monsters. They beat the system too easily and clean me out. She can sit back and watch.”

There was no way you were going to let him step all over them. “Fuck you. It’s not her fault she gets around your shitty way to make money.”

He rounded the corner and stepped out from his booth. Holy _fuck_. He was a lot bigger than you thought he was. At least six feet tall, lumbering out with hard, weighted steps. Broad shoulders and arms just thick enough to throttle you without even breaking a sweat. Beneath his wild facial hair was a pair of scarred lips curled into a snarl.

Your heart dropped into your stomach, but you pursued anyway. “She has as much of a right as anyone else. Plenty of people could figure out your system the hard way and win. And if she has an advantage that she can’t control, then tough luck. Looks like you won’t be stealing from as many people as you thought.”

Oh, god. Why were you running your mouth again? You couldn’t stop. It didn’t help that with every word he inched closer, knuckles twitching as he curled his hands into fists. This wasn’t some guy that got his accreditation from the committee to set up shop. He traveled with the carnival and made a living where the cash flowed. And judging by the way he reached for his pocket, he looked like he had nothing left to lose.

“WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?”

You swallowed thickly, not even realizing how hard your heart pounded in your ears. Papyrus. It was a little funny how he chose now of all times to show up, but you weren’t going to question it. If you put stock into anyone’s magic to make sure the kids were safe, it was him.

“What, you part of this crowd, too? Get. Lost.”

“NOW, NOW, HUMAN. IT WOULD BE IN YOUR BEST INTEREST NOT TO DO A VIOLENCE. WE HAVE COME HERE TO BE ENTERTAINED JUST LIKE EVERYONE ELSE.”

You couldn’t believe this dude. He wasn’t even intimidated in the slightest by the massive monster standing between the two of you. He just stared through Papyrus and maintained heavy eye contact with you, challenging you, egging you on.

“Never mind, we don’t wanna play anymore!”

“No refunds,” he hissed, flecking spittle all over Papyrus’ face.

You bit your tongue when Papyrus stretched an arm out to stop you from making things any worse. “I AM DISAPPOINTED IN YOU. THE CARNIVAL IS MEANT TO BE A FUN PLACE FOR EVERYONE. MY BROTHER AND THE CHILDREN PLAYED HERE JUST MOMENTS AGO. WHY IS SHE DIFFERENT?”

That was true. When you’d walked up, Sans had been the one losing miserably just to tick the kids off. The guy didn’t have a problem with things then, so why now? You watched him regard you with just as much contempt as he could muster.

“I don’t serve _monster fuckers._ ”

The words were just harsh enough that you physically recoiled at their bite. Sans’ eyesockets went dark while Papyrus’ hands clenched into fists. Both of them were on edge now. You weren’t going to let them get hurt or locked up because of your own fucking mouth, so you stepped a few feet back.

“We get it. We’ll leave.”

The kids were already halfway through the park as soon as you said it. They tore away, on the verge of tears, trying to distance themselves from the worker and his poisonous tone.

Papyrus led the groups to one of the rides while you and Sans lagged behind.

“What an asshole,” you choked out, trying to mask your sheer mortification with anger. “Why would he say something like that? He doesn’t even know me.”

“yeah.”

“That’s still fucked up! It’s none of his business.”

“uh huh.”

“I don’t understand why it’s different. What, he’s fine with me being friends with monsters, but as soon as I’m in a relationship, all of a sudden it’s an abomination? No. I don’t care about that. People like him are why I would go through with it anyway. Not to spite him, but to prove that there can be something more.”

You were so focused on your rant that you hadn’t noticed how out of it Sans looked.

“Hey. Are you okay? He didn’t…get to you, did he? I mean. It was all on me. His bigotry. He outright admitted that he didn’t have a problem with you.”

He closed his eyes and chose his next words carefully. “it does. mean somethin’. it’s…i don’t know how to phrase it. we’re fine just throwin’ away gold for his shitty game, but not…real enough for him to accept somethin’ that makes us more than just a fad.”

You frowned. He was right. The guy was basically saying that monsters were fine in his book, so long as they weren’t…what? Stealing human women? What the fuck kind of argument was that? He took it out on you, but it was clear to see that he meant it to be an insult toward monsters. That you should be ashamed for even entertaining the idea that monsters could mean something more to you than just a casual acquaintance. That they had just as much to offer as humans could. That they were just as complex and _not_ simply sentient animals.

“You’re right. I didn’t think about that.” You were a bit embarrassed at how you’d flipped this onto you. It wasn’t right. Sans and the rest of them were the ones that received the brunt of the criticisms. Only a small population was wary of their presence and treated them differently, but you couldn’t pretend to know what it was like.

“don’t sweat it.” He returned to his usual posture, slouching just enough so he could maintain his laissez-faire attitude. “hey, ferris wheel comin’ up. let’s _take it_ _for a spin_.”

“You were rehearsing that one, weren’t you?”

“might’ve already told it to tori.”

You sighed. “She laughed hard enough that you knew you had to try it on me, didn’t you?”

“wow. looks like it’s no use tryin’ to _pull one over_ ya.”

“Sans, I love you, but please. I know you can do better than that.”

You waited in line and made sure all the kids had a chance to get on. All of them were old enough to ride by themselves, which was a relief. When the next empty car rolled around, Papyrus turned to face you and his smile fell.

“sorry, bro. gotta wait down here for the kids gettin’ off.” Sans shrugged. “you two have fun.”

He didn’t respond. He just…stood there. You immediately regretted asking his brother for help in tricking him to ride with you.

“Paps, if you don’t want to, that’s fine. I’ll just…go later.”

“NO!!!” He pushed past the gate and clambered into the seat, somehow tucking his legs in enough that he could fit comfortably. “NYEH HEH…THIS IS WHAT BESTIES DO. THEY RIDE RIDES TOGETHER! PLATONICALLY!!!”

Sans winked at you when you stepped up to the platform, careful not to trip and fall flat on your face. The smaller of the skelebros backed off and went to wait at the fence just outside the ride. When you saw him turn his back on you, that was when the full realization hit you. You swallowed your doubts and planted yourself directly across from Papyrus, the operator shutting the door behind you.

“WH-WHERE ARE THE SEATBELTS???”

“Oh, rides like these don’t have them.” The car jolted and Papyrus hung on to the sides for dear life, his eyesockets blown wide and fingers gripping the metal hard enough for you to wince. “It’s okay, Paps. It’s safe, I promise.”

“I-I AM NOT SCARED. I AM JUST CONCERNED ABOUT THE CHILDREN!” He peered at your suspicious expression and cracked. “OKAY MAYBE I AM A LITTLE…UNNERVED. BUT THIS IS NOTHING THAT I CANNOT HANDLE, FOR I AM THE BRAVEST SKELETON THERE IS.”

“Bravest _monster_ ,” you corrected, liking the way the tension eased on his face. “Just think about it this way: when we get to the top, the view is gonna be totally worth it.”

You sat in silence. It was nice to be so far removed from the rest of the carnival. As soon as your car inched up, Papyrus seemed to relax. He got used to the subtle creaking of the ride and how it swayed with the breeze. It was surreal being up this high. Watching the people flicker from place to place, cars shrinking in the distance, the roads becoming winding paths instead of massive intersections.

You picked at your cuticles and avoided staring at him. You didn’t want him to be uncomfortable. But this was so unlike him. Most of your time was spent chatting and giggling, not just…sitting around saying nothing. You had no idea where to even begin. And you were going to make yourself sick if you made this last any longer, judging by the way you’d drawn blood by peeling away too much of your own skin.

“Um, Paps…”

He tore away from the view and grinned at you expectantly. “YES?”

“I wanted to…talk to you about what happened. Between us.”

The lump in your throat grew. Do or die. He was avoiding the topic all night. But it wasn’t healthy for him to just keep this all hidden away, especially since it was a really big misunderstanding.

“OH. THAT IS NOT NECESSARY.”

“But it is.” He was checking out mentally, you could just feel it. “I wanted to…I didn’t want to leave things the way they were. I have to tell you. The reason why I reacted the way I did…it wasn’t because of…”

You weren’t sure how to word this, and his guarded expression was causing what little confidence you had to dwindle.

“PLEASE, I DO NOT THINK–”

“I wanted you to kiss me.”

There. You said it. You fucking said it. Against everything that your instincts told you, you took the plunge and put your feelings on the line.

Papyrus shifted and looked outside the car, purposefully avoiding your eyes. “NYEH HEH…THAT IS…VERY FLATTERING. BUT I DO NOT THINK THAT…”

“Please, hear me out. Okay? We’ve been friends for a long time. And it’s been…long enough that I’ve been having…feelings. Romantic feelings. For you.” You really wished you were more eloquent than this. “That day was amazing. I had so much fun. And you did what I wanted to. You were braver than I could ever be. I just…I was afraid. I’m afraid of being that close to anyone, even you.” Tears welled up in your eyes and you refused to let them run down and ruin the moment. Even though your voice started to crack. “But I don’t want to be that way anymore. I want to be with someone that cares for me. That shows me that I deserve to be happy. And I want that person to be you.”

He placed both hands on your shoulders gently. Now you were making full contact. But instead of being reassured, the vibe he gave off only made you that much more apprehensive. This wasn’t what you expected. The Papyrus you knew would’ve been ecstatic, he would’ve been jumping for joy, blushing, going on full rants about how happy he was. This somber, serious skeleton was nearly unrecognizable, and the dread only grew in the pit of your stomach.

“BESTIE…I APPRECIATE THE SENTIMENT, BUT…I FEEL AS THOUGH WE SHOULD JUST REMAIN FRIENDS.”

You watched his mouth move as he spoke, but heard none of it. Something about the date. Maybe an explanation as to why. It was all static in your ears. A cold sweat broke at the base of your neck. You bit your tongue, focusing on the pain of your body so as not to linger on the sheer crushing weight of his rejection.

“I AM GLAD WE SPOKE ABOUT THIS. PHEW, IT WAS VERY HARD NOT TO BRING IT UP IN FRONT OF EVERYONE. NOW THAT THE AIR IS CLEARED, WE CAN GO BACK TO BEING CLOSER THAN EVER! PLATONICALLY!!!”

The car descended from its apex height and your mood went along with it. Papyrus rattled off about the carnival and everything he’d done since you got here. You only half-listened. It was hard to decipher anything he said when all you could do was sit there and analyze every single fucking terrible decision you’d made in the past two weeks.

“DID YOU WANT TO GO UP AGAIN? WE CAN TAKE TURNS ON PLAYING THAT ‘I SPY’ GAME THAT THE CHILDREN ENJOY SO MUCH!”

You stood up before he could even finish his sentence. “Um, actually Paps, I think I’m just gonna…head out. It’s been a long night and Toriel said she wanted to meet for dinner somewhere, so…”

You pushed past the ride operator and he let out a grunt of surprise. No one in line seemed to care that you were on the verge of tears. The kids noticed you right away, though, and trailed after you while you tore through the crowds.

You pulled your phone from your bra and hit Toriel’s name. She picked up immediately.

“Hello! It is Toriel.”

“Tori, where are you?” You asked, glancing around at all the unfamiliar attractions. “I need to drop the kids off. I’m so sorry, but I’ve got an emergency.”

She went silent for a second, but put her Mom Pants™ on and her voice turned commanding. “I am at the fried dough stand. I will meet you out front.”

Locques jogged up to make sure he was at your pace. You pretended not to notice the look of concern written all over his face.

Toriel came into view, standing with her hands folded over her lap. As soon as you were within reach, she drew you in for an embrace. You buried your face in her shoulder and your entire body wracked with hiccups. It was fucking embarrassing as hell that it came to this, and in front of all her kids no less, but she didn’t have time to lecture you for possibly scarring the rest of them.

“What happened?” she asked softly, rubbing small circles along your back. “Did someone say something to you?”

You gathered yourself up after a few seconds. “No. I’m sorry. I just. I can’t explain. Are you going to be alright here? If I leave?”

“Do not worry about us.” She was stern with you. “One of the children’s mothers is here. She is nearing the end of her shift and can fill in for you.”

The finality of the situation got to you. You realized how selfish you were being. You were going to ruin her night, and for what? Because you didn’t get your way? No. This was stupid. You weren’t about to let something so minor ruin the rest of your night. You told yourself this a hundred thousand times before. Being friends was just as good. Your relationship withstood the test of time and you weren’t about to soil it because of your own inappropriate feelings.

You cleared your throat and stopped her in the middle of her rant. “I…I can stay. Never mind. I thought that…” You trailed off, not liking the way she squinted at you. “I didn’t think I could handle it. But I can. I’m stronger than that.”

“You are.” She didn’t even know what you were referring to, but believed in you regardless. “Let us see if we can find some napkins. I will get you something to drink.”

You refused to let yourself crumble. Not when you had so many people depending on you. So despite your initial plan to run away into isolation, you forced yourself to mingle.

You got through the rest of the night without any more incidents.

By the time you got home, you were exhausted. Drained. You had nothing left in you. You didn’t even bother changing into pajamas. You just stripped out of everything and flopped onto your bed. Face down into the pillow. Ready for death.

Your phone buzzed. It was Alphys. She wanted to talk now? Why?

You ended the call. She ignored your blatant message and dialed again. And again. Until the ringtone pounded in your ears just enough where you reached for it.

“Aly…I’m kind of in bed right now.”

“T-this is important!” She sounded like she was about to explode. “Were you at the carnival tonight?”

“Yeah. Why?”

“D-did you get up on stage with a performer named Ro? In front of e-everyone? While t-they sang to you?!”

“Uh huh. Yup. They roped me into it.”

“Oh my god??? Oh my god!!!” She sounded like she was pacing. Another nervous tick.

“Slow down for a second. What’s the big deal? It was embarrassing, yeah, but that was hours ago.”

“I know, b-but it just got on U-Undernet! I had to call you to make sure that it was you because I didn’t want to assume and then freak you out for nothing but now that you’re saying you were the one I’m not sure what to even say!!!”

Fuck. She was overloading. “Aly, I need you to take a deep breath. And tell me slowly why this is such a big deal.”

She paused for a long minute before getting back to you. Good. “I-it’s. R-R-Ro. The one you met. They’re…a sp-special kind of monster.”

“Go on…”

“T-they…um…look, it’s very complex! Most monsters bond with others because of extreme attraction and mutual trust, but some monsters a-are more complicated and aren’t physically capable of bonding with another person on a permanent level. They are able to t-try the process out on anyone, consent or not, and gain the s-same benefits, just without any k-kind of ramifications for d-doing so. B-because of the sheer numbers of their partners they’re con-considered to be more promiscuous in nature a-and while not necessarily frowned upon, it is a very…taboo subject. S-since bonding is all about consent, m-monsters that ignore that just for their p-personal gain are breaking some v-very serious, basic morals that we all follow!”

You weren’t sure what she was getting at, and it was making you nervous. “Aly. You’re scaring me.”

She huffed. “W-what I’m trying to say is that Ro is one of those monsters! I researched them when I was a Royal Scientist to figure out if maybe there was a connection between them and determination, but the results were bust! I studied their physiology extensively and I know the process when I see it! What th-they were doing to you on stage was taking your SOUL out and seducing it!!! In front of EVERYONE!!!”

What.

“And normally it wouldn’t be a big deal b-but I knew that you would never say yes to s-something so lewd if you knew! And to those ki-kind of monsters it’s considered a real honor, but everyone that was w-watching got the equivalent of…SOFTCORE PORNOGRAPHY!!!”

The.

“Th-that’s what a ‘SOUL beat’ is! It’s the unique imprint of a SOUL that makes us able to link up and bond, but it takes years o-of intimacy and trust for it to be remotely doable! But monsters l-like Ro are able, somehow, to hear and feel them, to manipulate their own SOULs to resonate at the same frequency a-and amplitude, s-so they’re able to trick someone’s SOUL into believing that t-they’re ready for something like t-that!!!”

Fuck.

“A-and while not leaving a-any lasting damage, b-because as I said, the bond is not permanent, t-they specifically do it with the i-i-intent to receive pleasure from the ACT! S-so it’s completely selfish and j-just downright RUDE! Especially to do w-with a human, who doesn’t e-even know what it MEANS!!!”

She panted on the other end, her rant finally coming to a close. You stared up at the ceiling as your brain went numb.

“A-are you there?”

“Yeah. I’m here.”

“…d-do you want to talk about it?”

You hung up the phone in response, rolling over and wondering just how the fuck you got yourself into this mess.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **question of the day** : what's your favorite location in undertale?
> 
> did anyone notice anything weird with the titles? they're anagrams ;)
> 
> comments are always welcomed!!!

**Author's Note:**

> this series updates **tuesdays and fridays**!
> 
> like my fics? you could always [leave me a tip](https://ko-fi.com/A258IM)!
> 
> i work two jobs right now, so honestly keeping up with this schedule is a pain, but your comments always make it worth my while. 
> 
> **question of the day** : who is your least favorite undertale character?


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